My life growing up was horrible, to say the very least… I spent most of my childhood blacked out and uncontrollable, just to escape the world. There was sexual abuse, vicious beatings, and EXTREME verbal abuse every single day.
My drug abuse began when I was trying to rebel at school, out of sheer boredom. I actually EXCELLED in school, starting in Kindergarten. School got to the point where it wasn’t a challenge for me anymore. By the time I got into 7th grade, I was bored with school. I began getting sent down to the principal’s office quite a bit. I was on the waiting list for a prestigious private school because of my test scores, but I was soon removed from the list because of my behavioral issues in school.
Once I got hooked on drugs, surprisingly our family got closer. We would use and sell drugs together as a family, so in that aspect we supported one another. My father had been dead for years at this point, and my mom was already a heroin addict. My environment was far from safe. Eventually, even my mom kicked me out of the house, so I lived out of the garage without my mom even knowing it. It was a horrible time in my life. I QUICKLY blew through all $10,000 of my savings, and felt as if I was on the brink of suicide…
The turning point of my addiction is quite amazing, really. My mom was gone, so I snuck into the house to sleep on the floor. I had nothing left to live for and I thought I had tried everything, so I cried out to God for help. God told me to open my bible, and let Him help me. I had a random moment of clarity, and from there I had my mom take me to a mental hospital that night, to begin my journey of recovery.
When I was ready to be discharged, I didn’t want to leave. I wanted to keep on this journey of healing. My counselor at the mental hospital said that he had somewhere I could go for a long-term program. I would have to work hard, go to church, and study my bible. I was ready, no matter the cost! I thanked God because His plan was now being carried out.
I have seen an AMAZING change in my life since coming to Grace Centers of Hope. After the fog lifted from the years of drug abuse, I can now begin to live again. My biological brothers and sisters ALL stopped using drugs as well, and they have been an incredible support system for me. I have also gained many new brothers and sisters in Christ here at GCH. I am starting to see the joy in life again, which is something that I lost so many years ago. To those who are still fighting their demons, I advise you to stop fighting and give in to God’s will and plans for you. You have to give yourself a chance at having a good life, and drugs are NOT the way to do it. I finally love ME again, and I am loving this new life.